The pReview Re-viewing of..
God Bless America
(it is highly recommended to view the trailer and THEN read)
(warning: Contains profanity and justifiable homicide.)
by Jeff Finck
Release Date: May 11, 2012
The premise: Bobcat Goldtwait is sick of the world's shit. So, he wrote a story about a man called Frank. Frank, played by Joel Murray, is a middle aged, average nobody, who has a tumor in his brain. With nothing left to lose, Frank decides that, instead of killing himself, he should rid the world of its inanity by wrapping the Second Amendment around the faces of useless people, all with the help of a 16 year old girl called Roxy (Tara Lynne Barr.. No relation).
The trailer opens up with Frank sitting at home at night, all by his lonesome, zoning out in front of late night television. Of course, the only things on TV are nigh unwatchable. There are terrible people on the news protesting a cancer patient’s funeral because he was gay. (Think: The Westboro Baptist Church). There are ridiculous infomercials. (Pig fart ringtones.. Seriously.) On the right-wing, nightly news, Obama is being compared to Hitler. (Ironic, much?) Children are setting homeless people on fire. (Bum lights? Okay.. That was kind of horrible.). And a reality show rip-off of The Bad Girls Club, or whatever the fuck that was called. In the middle of his "500 Channels, but Ain't Shit On" marathon, we are shown why he is trying to just zone out: Frank is told that he has a large tumor in his brain by an extremely, over the top, very professional doctor, who takes a phone call in the middle of breaking the news to him.
We then cut back to Frank at home on the couch. He has nothing to live for now. With a gun in his mouth, he contemplates all of those vacuous things in the world and what has led to this moment. This would be a dark moment for anyone.. The cold taste of metal.. Those thoughts swirling around your head.. And then a show that is basically the perfect example of feckless reality: My Super Sweet Sixteen, where whiny teenagers throw fits over their First World problems. As the show’s subject, Chloe, throws a conniption fit over being spoiled, suddenly things snap together. Frank's depression becomes anger, and then his anger turns to hate, which will lead to the world's suffering.. And, of course, everyone knows that suffering is what leads to the dark side. (Amiright?)
Frank decides that he must rid the world of its uselessness. This is a very difficult task, however, because the world is just, like, absolutely filled with it. He has to start somewhere, though, and what better target than the first person who inspired it? Chloe. Chloe is the tantrum-throwing, spoiled brat who wanted an Escalade for her birthday, but flipped the hell out when she got a Lexus instead. Frank tracks her down and, while working up the nerve to go through with it, meets Roxy. Roxy witnesses Chloe's murder and decides that Frank is "awesome" for killing her because she always thought Chloe was a bitch, anyway, and had it coming. She then decides to accompany Frank on his banal cleanse. (I'm trying to decide if that was worse or better than "Bum Lights"..) It’s kind of like Natural Born Killers, except these two actually seem to be killing with a purpose.
Roxy proves to be a foul mouthed companion, especially when she talks about things that "rip her cock off", like the Kardashians, or people who use "rock star" as an adjective, or woman who refer to their breasts as "the girls", or anyone who wears crystals. She's 16, so I kind of have to give her a break. I mean, she doesn't yet know anything about the fuckery of politicians, solicitors, creditors, or even remember when Kevin Federline was almost famous. (It's not too late to still make fun of this guy yet, is it?)
The two go on a rampage across the U.S. and murder everyone they deem fit for bullets. (Fit for Bullets is the name of my band, by the way.) The final montage of the trailer shows a glimpse into their bloody rampage as they, pretty much, leave behind anyone who lacks common courtesy: Youngsters who don't know how to act in a theater, cell phone abusers, people who smear their hypocritical beliefs across America like a dog who has anal sac problems, people who can't and REFUSE to show decency in the parking lot, people who support American "Superstar", and stuffed animals.. Because.. You know.. Fuck stuffed animals.
Unfortunately, and I hate to say it, but I don't think a lot of people are going to jump all over this one. It's a movie about murdering people. A LIGHT-HEARTED movie about murdering people. (Kinda like if Basketball Diaries was a comedy!) Granted, the people in question are complete wastes of air who should probably be held down and lashed to each other, that way, all of the uselessness will be in one spot.. And then we'll put them all in.. I don't know.. Manitoba, or something. I don't think anyone's using Manitoba.. Right, Canada? In any case, the movie (Do you hear that, protesters? Moooooovie.) seems quite excellent. We've all dealt with the vapid stupidity of one person or another, and we've all been to that point where we feel like filling their mouths with bees and kicking them in the eyes until they see how dumb they are. Most people, when they get to this point, use common sense and walk away.. It seems that when Bobcat Goldthwait got to that point, he created a movie that vents it all. And for that, I thank him! This should be pretty damn good.